The Tango Wench & her Pirate

The Tango Pirate needs a Wench

Tradition of a mistranslation

I am sure that some would find "beauty and deep meaning" if the terms "pirate" and "wench" had these terms been the English words we had chosen for Argentine Tango roles.  But instead the English-speaking tango community has settled on the traditional ballroom terms, "leader" and "follower," which are perhaps equally inappropriate terms as much as "pirate" and "wench."   "Leader and follower" are appropriate for ballroom, but they just are detrimental for improvisational, magical nature of Argentine tango.

Ambassadors of Peace on the Dance Floor

From the most humble  person in a nation to the president:  We are all ambassadors.  That is why I prefer the name "embajadora" for the person in the Rol Femenino in tango.  "Followers" have a limited part in real power, but the Rol Femenino is a powerhouse of talent and gives equilibrium to the tandem, improvisational dance of tango.  

And we need ambassadors!  How is peace maintained on the wild "streets" of the dance floor: People embracing each other, hypnotized by the music AND moving forward while making circles, stops and turns! 

Ambassadors keep us from road rage and mortal combat!

Music, Dance and the Survival of the Fittest

 

The thinking animal needs music and dance to survive. 

Darwin hushed the music. He thought, at first, that music and dance were not important for the survival of our species. Evidently, he wanted to think about music rather than listen and feel.  

Perhaps, unlike the Greek poets, Darwin did not want the Muses to distract him or, God forbid, get the him, as a clergyman, to move to the music! He was ignoring some important data. Music has preoccupied the poor, the rich,  and nearly all great thinkers throughout human history. What was Darwin missing?

Tango Chorophobia?

Most of us start out as children with no fear of dancing--that is, with no "chorophobia."  Psychological blocks sometimes come later and we don't even recognise them as fears.

The word "phobos" from ancient Greek means to avoid or withdraw, which is perhaps a better behavioral way of understanding phobias.   It is all too easy to avoid or withdraw from dance either before learning the skill or after having bad experiences while dancing. The good news is there are effective ways to "treat" chorophobia.  I will address solutions at the conclusion of this post.

The Five Languages of Tango

The wise tango dancer is fluent in five languages

Do you know your two primary "tango-love languages"?  Gary Chapman's book, "The Five Love Languages" has been on the New York Times Best Seller List since 2009.  Many people feel that his concepts have helped them to understand their partner's needs and feel that they are better understood by their partner too.

Tango gives you a chance to be far more perceptive about these languages than the average person.

I suggest you think about his categories from the perspective of being a more psychologically aware tango dancer.  The first place to start is self-awareness.  Consider the above five categories shown in the illustration above.  What do you think are your two dominant languages from those that are listed above?  Check your self-perception by taking the test and then, read on.

T for Tango Addict

Tango is her sin?  Her addiction?

Are you a tango addict?  A tango sinner?  Do you shamefully bear the "T" upon your forehead?

I hope that that one day all the references about being a tango addict will be seen as worn out joke.  I know it's easy to talk in terms of getting a "fix" with anything that is pleasurable, but it's time to give it a rest, especially for tango.

I have a therapist friend, who says in all seriousness that I am a tango "addict."  He grew up in a church that banned all dancing because it was a sin.  He presently spends far more time in front of a television than I do dancing.   His boob-tube time, just as my time dance, is not destroying our lives or giving us hangovers. His TV and my tango are activities that are not ruining our social lives.  We continue to be able to perform at work.  Is his "clinically informed" diagnosis that I am a tango addict a product of scientific analysis?  I think it is more likely that his reasoning is clouded by his earlier belief that dance was a sin.   Sin/addiction.  One coin, two sides.  In countries like Cuba, where dancing as a culture is seen as healthy, you won't hear "sin/addiction" language about dance.

When she mistakenly thinks I am Zorro

I cannot be Zorro, my favorite TV character as a child.  I am too white . . .

. . . but sometimes I get away with it in a dimly lighted milonga.  I am more like the Lone Ranger, that is, if I want to indulge myself with delusions of grandeur.

Earlier I wrote about the idea of valuing partners and how it will add to one's enjoyment in my last post, Tango and the Path of Pleasure.  The concept on a psychological level was that one can be tricked into valuing others or one can choose to value others as a chosen psychological Path of Pleasure.  The quest of going down a more psychologically mature  path of kindness and spiritual curiosity is obviously a way that assures a much more sustainable enjoyment of tango, or any type of pleasure, through one's life.  Along these lines of "valuation," let me give a few more examples:

Tango and the Path of Pleasure

The Path of Pleasure can be a spiritual path, unlike what many religions teach. It's certainly heavenly to dance tango.

Something occurred to me as I was reading some studies about the brain's response to the price of wine--or at least the perception of the price of wine.  Whether it is tango or the taste of wine when we value the object of our desires, the pleasure goes up.  But what happens when we truly value others.  Doesn't it make sense that our pleasure in life will go up?

At the bottom of this post, I will introduce you to some remarkable results from a few psychological studies on the relationship to valuing wine to enjoying wine.  Yet, all of them are missing a much larger spiritual lesson.   The bottom line of these studies, which may not surprise you, is that when people believe that a particular wine is expensive, then the pleasure of drinking that wine increases too.  But what does it all mean in application?  Put $200 price tags on the wine you serve so your guests can have more pleasure?!

Blocks from Dancing Freely

Dancers breaking the prohibition of dance
at the US Capital's Monuments

Why do people forget how to dance?

Blocks.  

Psychological obstacles, legal consequences and in nearly every country, religious beliefs.

The American Constitution's First Amendment provides for Freedom of Speech but not dance.   When it comes to human development, the order of freedoms should follow our human development:

Freedom of Dance comes first as babies.

Freedom of Speech comes next and then much later . . .

Freedom of Religion (or personal philosophy).

No one can teach you to dance

No one can teach you what you already know.  Others can help you develop and uncover and nurture what you already know, but I believe that this is different than "teaching." Teachers do both: Teach and uncover. The best teachers know where uncovering starts and ends. They look for "talent" (latent abilities) rather than mostly focusing on every little error that a person may make.

So it is with dance.  If "dancing" means "to respond bodily to music." No one can teach you to dance because you already were born with that hardwired to your humanity.  The same is true of being the speaking animal.  No one has truly "taught" you to speak--to communicate your feeling and desires. You were born to dance and speak as a human animal. It is too late to teach children to speak or dance at grammar school.  They already can without the "benefit" of education.  Those who are the best teacher-guides know (or at least intuit) that their role is to co-discover (the external world) and co-uncover (the internal world) of these primary human talents of dance and speech.

What I learned from a ballet teacher

An interview with a ballerina . . .

Jenny has a remarkable business--a type of missionary business--dedicated to dance.  Most of her staff members are volunteers, and I wanted to be part of the good that she is doing. The mostly volunteer staff is all talented dancers, and have it in their blood to dance.  Jenny asked me to help with the theme "tango" at her studio's second anniversary in a small city in Germany, where I was living recently.

I shocked poor Jenny with the suggestion that she should be my partner to perform this tango demonstration in front of all her students, their parents and her staff.  

The Tango Attitude IQ Test

In the field of mental health, a new way of thinking about "intelligence" has emerged to be more accepted:  Emotional Intelligence.  A subtype of Emotional Intelligence is Attitudinal Intelligence. Attitude can be also defined "as the line of travel a plane takes as it comes in for a landing."   If the attitude is too steep, you crash.  Attitude is everything when it comes to flying a plane and dancing tango. 

How to hone down a "square-pegged" body

Your body was born to dance.  Our bodies are sometimes like square-pegs, not fitting into the roundness of the music.  But if we let the music in, the music can transform us. This transformation is the natural bodily response. It rounds us, hones us down.   Dance-like movements (called steps) are often merely square holes, which also can be rounded by the power of music.  

Tango lyrics: Dangers in not knowing a few songs

Cupid cries over a bag of gold;
a man pines over his tragic loss.

                                                                                   
...also in German

Perhaps there is some beauty in just listening to the music when you don't speak Spanish.  But I am sure that you will be convinced by this post that knowing the lyrics of at least a few tangos can be very important, especially the lyrics for a song you might want to perform or use for a special occasion, such as a wedding.

Biagi's interpretation of "La Marcha Nupcial" (the Wedding March) is an excellent example!   I know.  I just was married, and the majority of guests were from the tango community.  Sure, it was tempting to play "La Marcha Nupcial" at our milonga/reception after exiting a wedding palace in Strasbourg, France. However, this tango's lyrics would have created an ironic backdrop--once you know the meaning of the words (given in English below).

He will always dance better than I . . .

I cannot compete with the best dancer.
He embodies the music better than I,
His embrace fits more nicely to my partner.
His movements are excitingly new,
And hewn from years of experience.
But can his dancing truly compete with me?
My soul and hers dance to the music of love.

My lover snuggles in bed with a novelist,
His body is a book and he enthralls her with his tale.
But can his stories compete with mine?
My story is now ours, a novel with dual authorship.

My Lover melts when she hears
The singer’s melody, touching her breast.
His voice helped her through months of tears.
But can he compete with my song, my lullaby?

She stands in awe of great artists in history.
Their paintings cast a long shadow over mine.
But can they compete with our self-portrait,
An animated canvas brushed by love each day together?

Writers, poets, musicians, artists. . . and dancers–
They all add to our love of the world around us.
Enjoyment of those outside of ourselves makes us whole.
Our love lets go of having to be the best, the one and only.
She is free to be herself, and to love creativity around her.
Our art is the freedom from jealousy, a tandem dance of love.

Note on the "singer's voice":  Miguel di Genova of "Otras Aires" sang to my fiancée while driving home from a very sad time in her life.  Why would I be jealous of the great artists and friends in my her life?  Tango couples have difficulties because of holding on to the hope that they are the "one and only."  There is never a "one and only."   There is a whole universe of people who bring richness to us, and of course, to our partners.  Let go, and let it be so!


The original poem appeared on London's Tango Folly and also has been wonderfully translated by Clara M into German at www.tango-therapeut.blogspot.de. I was totally amazed at the "poetic license" she used as a translator, and she may have made the poem better than the original.

Photo Credit

Is your Milonga on Mars or Venus?

Tangueros are not from Mars, nor tangueras from Venus.
Both are from Earth.

Your milonga is on Earth.

Earth is a great middle-point meeting place for Martian and Venusian dancers to visit a milonga.   The Morning Star and the Red Planet send representatives to meet here at milongas, and it is really pretty cool.  I have been an astute observer of the differences of "Venusians" since I was a small child, and yes, these differences seem to bring the warmer Venusian climate to my cool Martian body temperature.  I have to admit, in all honesty however, that the more I know about neurological research and cross-cultural research, I have learned that men and women are remarkably similar.

For dancers the most important myth of differences is that women have more talent and respond to music better.  If you are from Latin America, you will have a hard time understanding what I am talking about.  In your culture men do not need to repress their masculine expression of dance.  So at least when it comes to dance, I am mostly speaking to much of America and Europe, where the Venus/Martian Myth is obvious as ... as the flat Earth:  That is, very obvious for the untrained observer.

The power of the Embrace

The Three M's: Starting with eMbrace, then Movement and Music.

  

If the Three M's were celestial bodies in a solar system, the eMbrace would be the sun, and Movement and Music would be planets.  Is it just a coincidence that people who have lots of hugs also are more resilient to viruses than those will fewer hugs, as a recent experiment demonstrated?

Biologically speaking, we start out being moved through the birth canal, being moved to the arms our mother.  The eMbrace is the starting point and ending point of our lives as we melt into the body of the one who embraces us.  That is our embrace.  The eMbrace starts all of our love relationships.  In 1998, I knew my last time with my mother would be our last earthly time together.  I embraced her and told her I loved her as my last moment with her.  We wept.   Only months later, I embraced my second son as he came into the world.   Such is the circle of life. The eMbrace is the Alpha and Omega of tango as well.

Refinding Sara at Christmas

Sara is my closest friend.  No one can replace the kind of friendship we have.  She's a breathing, living being.  Sara is my bandoneón.   I know that it is strange to say this, but surely I am not the only one who holds the wonderful delusion that the mystery of life dwells in an inanimate musical instrument. I didn't have to court Sara. She courted me. She accepted me as a beginner and allowed me to learn who she was inside. While doing that I found out who I was inside. If only more couples could do this!

Her smile

Sara has a personality all of her own.  Compared to any other instrument I know, the bandoneón is truly like a person.  Maybe I am mad, but I feel her presence most when I just listen to her breathe.  I open her smiling case and let her breathe in my embrace.  Her smell is the perfume of wood, enamel and a touch of oil reinforced with years of having given me so much joy or having helped me during times of sadness.  She smiles with delight as I open up her case.  She leaps into my arms, ready to play.

Now that I think back, I am sure of it:  Sara looked forward to the times I had troubles with my romantic life.  That is when I made up new tangos and would play with her for hours.  This ritual started when my first girlfriend, Elena, had left Montevideo to live in Buenos Aires with her parents.  I was so broken hearted, but when I pulled out my bandoneón, only then I realized how bad it hurt to have my first love move away.  My bandoneón was a channel to the emotions that I hid not only from the world but from myself.  I embraced Sara and she consoled me.

The day Elena left, I sat with my bandoneón on my lap, but I couldn’t play at first.  I was numb.  I just opened and closed her bellows and let her breathe with me.  I felt her empathy, her soul. Eventually a vals came out as powerful as I ever had played – Desde el Alma.  This was tango.  Its essence.  My heart ached and now I could speak from my soul about this music that my parents so loved.  Now tango was truly my music, not just my parents' music. 

The naked truth about The Naked Truth

Genesis 3: Adam says to God, "I hid from you because I was naked.                        auf deutsch
 God said, 'Who told you that you were naked?'"

The Untypical Sexteto Típica

Recently a comment of not listening to the music while improvisationally dancing tango surprised me.  An advanced, German dancer at a French milonga told me: “I never listen to the music. The music throws me off from what the man is doing."  Gratefully, she added:  "But the music was transparent as we danced tonight.”   I think that she could have listened with many men before, but had trained herself to be deaf to the music.  Certainly I have not been the only one who dances musically with her.  I KNOW this!  How many women before her have I danced with that were not listening to the music?  At times it feels like there is no way to make the music transparent to my partner or I don't sense the music she hears.  But I think I know where this problem comes from:  Shame on the teachers who teach steps.  Dance is not steps!  Dance is the emotional and somatic reaction to music--a behavioral reaction only found in the human species.

The Torment of a Dancer

The torment of a musician is that he strums out his heart so all can hear his soul.
The torment of an artist is that no one knows the water colors were from her tears.
The torment of a dancer is the horror of the cliff, merely the edge of the stage.
Then there is tango--a torment-less duet of music-that-is-dance, an embrace of two.




Meet the dancer

How to please a woman

As in life, so in tango every man should know about what women want.

• Woman would be glad if the roles were reversed: That there would be too many men rather than too many women.  They would not complain if men were sitting it out, waiting for a dance (at least for the first few years).  
• Women would be very picky about men, and if there were many good dancers, the

Tango: The "Synful" Dance

Tango culture at its center and at its best is a community of harmonizing elements:

The whole dance floor is synchronized in movements to symphonic* (harmonized) sounds of musical notes. And tandem dancers,  synsomatic in their dance, are perhaps some of the best examples on earth of "two becoming one" in a spontaneous way.

Synsomatic
In order to find this epicenter of tango, I try to be more fully present in my own body, my feeling, my breathing.  Only then can I evolve into the dancing animal with four harmonizing legs, four lungs, and four cerebral lobes; four eyes--two eyes open, two eyes closed, and two hearts drumming together the most primal of all symphonic rhythms. 

The Many Hands of Manipulation

Literally "manipulation" is skillfully working with one's hand,
just as a sculptor manipulates clay.

What you learn from tango will help you in life.  As we dance, our hands are constantly touching and we both have a hand on each other's back.  Are all hands the same?  Of course not.  And so from tango we learn that hands have a spectrum of behaviors, feelings and emotions behind them.

In the "real world" hands are not so often experienced by others at work and between friends as we dancers experience them.  And many languages* do not help clarify this spectrum in the definition of "manipulation," meaning "the work of hands."  Manipulation in day-to-day usage has mostly negative connotations as I hear it.

Official definition for Manipulation

Manipulation's official definition does not help us understand the wide spectrum of behaviors of manipulative behavior, ranging from "ethical and appropriate handling" to "unethical and over-bearing handling."  So I am going suggest more clarity to the subject by adding five different Greek prefixes to help clarify, using social tango as a way to understand the complexities of social interaction.

Tango's a bad boy magnet?

The Milonga Dialogues:                                                       German translation at this link

Don't touch that lever on the "E.I. Tango Magnet"!

Is Tango a magnet
for the emotionally impaired?

The Greek philosophers would meet in the streets and often converse about the meaning of life while eating together. Tango philosophers meet at milongas, and work out the meaning of life while observing the Travelers on the Wooden Path.

The Tango Effect--5 years later

Tango Therapist's 5th Birthday

Today my blog is five years old.  Also this week I will have posted 300 little pieces of my passion for tango.  Around five years ago, I discovered something that has transformed me, and it wasn't tango itself.

The Tango Effect
Tango had transformed the way I understood the patient/therapist relationship about three years after I started dancing tango better than salsa. I learned about "the tango effect" from so often--too often--hearing women say, "Wow, you led me to do things I never have done before."  I kept hearing this, and still do, but at the time I was startled because, I was feeling many women were (and still are) leading me to places I had never gone before.  I started calling these misunderstood tango roles as "the tango effect."

"Dancing about Architecture"

Perhaps you have heard this often quoted phrase that portrays dance as powerless to explain complex things.  Martin Mull's quote has been repeated by many others, like Frank Zappa.  

Dancers demonstrating principles of quantum physics

Who will defend dance as a way of expressing the concrete world?  

Evidently, "dance" is the strawman that is easily knocked down as not being very exacting.  When I first heard this quote, I too thought it was clever.  But is it really?

The Answer for Not Growing Old (T.A.N.G.O.)

The Answer for Not Growing Old (T.A.N.G.O) 

Tango has demonstrated clear indications of helping people decrease symptoms of Parkinson's disease.  Yet, there is a much larger group that tango-as-therapy could help:  The rest of humanity.

Staying active, constantly learning, connecting to others, human touch, practice in balance and exercise are all necessary to maintain physical and mental resiliency as we grow older.  It is NOT just exercise, dance is much more than that, but at least it is recognized as helping people physically.

Advantages of European "Encuentros"

Encuentros, perhaps better called "Tango Socials" have some excellent elements.  A friend of mine in Austria, says that Encuentros are evolving and over time the problems will fix themselves naturally.  I like his positive thought. Encuentros will continue because of certain advantages; however, there is a dark side that concerns me.  [Added note from original post:  In my attempt to be positive about encuentros some readers felt that I had reversed my opinion.  I have not.  However, since encuentros will continue because of the many positive elements, I hope that organizers see that some changes are needed.  There are some easy solutions, but every advantage has some very concerning disadvantage.]

What! No sex in heaven?

Do not fret, dear Angel.  There's hope.

Well, if you can believe the consensus of theologians, then there's no sex in heaven--at least for Christians.   But one thing is for sure:  There's tango.

Time-Warp Tango

Tango can play with your mind--a mind that has the tendency to erroneously perceive that time is going faster and faster as one becomes older.  I can think of nothing better than tango to reverse this false perception.  Tango can be practised as a time-warp laboratory in which time can be put into slow motion--still a false perception, but preferable.

The Beauty of Obligation

"Obligation" has become a dirty word to some in the tango world--something to be avoided. In reality, "obligation" is a wonderful word.   The word "obligation" is mostly understood to be a burden.  "Euphoria" means "good burden" or to "bear something."  Sometimes language blocks us from understanding concepts.  We need the word "eu-obligation" in our vocabulary.  I am obligated to my children, my family, my work, my neighbors, my environment, country and world. There are indeed moments when false "obligations" can ruin things, but mostly obligations are what make social animals truly social.

Musicality Praxis: The Bass Drummer

Today's focus on musicality starts with a visual.  The video clip below is produced by Leandro Díaz and Mauro Mauceri, musicians who teach dancers to be musical in their dance.  In another clip, they explain their mission. They noticed, as most musicians do, a wide gap between what dancers are doing and what the music is saying; so they began their work trying break it down for dancers.  Tango is the most wonderful dance there is for tandem improvisational dancing.  Tango promotes dancing exactly to the music more than any other dance because there is in fact no true "basic step."  Leandro and Mauro's observation is rather startling! How could tango not follow the music when that is essentially what tango is?

Magdalena's Enlightenment

I once noticed some turquoise shoes and a suitcase as I danced on the last evening of a tango festival. She had obviously gone up to her hotel room to get her suitcase before getting on a airplane home.  The message was clear, not only to me, but to all:  "It's either now or never."

Musicality Praxis: Building a tanda

In this post, I am going to suggest a way of musicality praxis that will grow and grow the way that suits you.  I am convinced that trying to be more musical always starts at the heart and grows naturally into your feet.  No matter what your role is, if you are musical you will help your partner feel it too. Men have an important role, but it is not just their job.  Women often complain that many men do not hear the beat; yet, I sense that many women are making it even harder by listening too much my body language.  I cannot know, but I think all this delay is causing a vicious circle because they are part of this problem of lagging behind the beat.  The man who is musical must begin his momentum ahead of the beat so that she lands on the beat.  How is this possible?  By letting the music lead.

Musicality Paxis: Be the "Conductor"

In the last post, I suggested an "equation" for better musicality for dancers:  E=MC2.  In today's post, I will suggest a practical way to bring musicality to light in your dance.

If you did not read the last post, I am challenging what dancers call "musicality"; so it may not be what you think you already learned in a so-called "advanced" dance class.  So I will say it again:

E=MC2: The equation for musicality

We dancers too often lose focus on the "E" which is central to musical dancing.  And the "M" and the "C squared" get too much attention.  Let me suggest an easy way to remember how to have three separate foci on musicality, stealing from a well-known equation:  E (emotion) is equal to graceful M (movement) and C2 (cognitions squared).  E=MC2 equates to musical dancing.  True, we must be thinkers in order to dance well.  That includes many cognitions through memory, experience and adaptability to who/what/when and why.  But emotion is equal to graceful movement and a large amount of cognitions (C2).

Warding off Dementia with Tango

Tango and dance in general gives us a chance to maintain the most precious organ in the body: The Brain.

The onset of dementia slowly degrades this "organ of adaptability" to be only one that is merely running autonomic functions of the body.  Dementia is a frightening disease.  What leisure activity has proven to be the most salutary to those at-risk for dementia?

Milonga of the Uninvited

It all started with an email from a friend and milonga organizer from another country who was coming to a milonga very near to where I live: "Are you going to the the encuentro*?"

"No.  I don't know anything about it," I replied.   I knew that many friends would be there.  Wow!  I wanted to go! How did I miss the announcement?!

I looked up the event on the Internet, and found that it was advertised for all to see, but really it was a VIP list of invitation-only guests.  Somehow this reminds me of being in my fourth grade class in which the rich kid told everyone:  "Hey everyone, I am having a pool party!  I will hand out the invitations tomorrow!" Tomorrow came, and half the class did not get invited.

Free Tango Lesson!
My not getting invited was a wonderful blessing in disguise.  It really did not take long before I saw

If Aristotle danced tango

Over-thinking in dance can ruin the spontaneity and artfulness of tango.  However, too many dancers go off in a different direction of not thinking much at all.  The problem with "over-thinking" is nearly always a product of thinking too much about steps and outward forms.   This anti-thinking perspective has created many"PhD's" in the world of tango.  Let me explain that:  In this case, "PhD's" means, "philosophically handicapped dancers." :-)

Through time until timelessness



The child within me holds you in the street,
I fell down and your embrace takes away my pain.

The friend within me holds you at the airport. 
I may never see you again as I go off to war.

2014: The Golden Age of Tango!

Many say that the Gold Age (Época de Oro) for tango was around 1938 to 1948.  It wasn't!  We are NOW in the Golden Age of Tango--but for listeners, not dancers.

Around 1938 to 1948 was the golden age for tango dancers.  Dance halls were full.  A few things happened after 1948 that changed this, but the difference that you can hear today is that after 1948 the musicians slowly began playing for listeners more than dancers (or perhaps more for themselves?).   Post-war Argentina had many changes, but simply stated, the the focus on the dancer shifted slowly to the tango listener.  The dancer was no longer "royalty."

¡Cabeceo!? No, oooouch! Face slam!

Cabeceo: The goal is hers as much
as yours in tango but only
to score in soccer

El hace un cabeceo... y ...
¡Goooooooool!

Cabeceos--hitting the ball with one's head in soccer--has only one goal: to "score." Of course, one scores at the expense of the other team.

The culturally aware tango dancer uses the cabeceo at no one's expense.  He politely and non-verbally "requests" a dance as a gentleman after the cortina and the music begins to play.  A slight movement with his head (la cabeza)--usually an upwards motion or a nod--signals this subtle exchange between a man and a woman.*  

Vitamin T

This is not a drug.

This is Vitamin T that you savor on your tongue, like no other vitamin.

Vitamin T is a complex vitamin, like "B complex."  Vitamin B complex includes 8 elements.  Vitamin T includes many more, but the basic three soul-nutrients are:

• A warm hug,
• The joy of bodily movement in dance, and
• The power of music to move one's soul. 

Directions:
Take daily.  Even while cooking or going for a walk.  For an enhanced effect, take it with a partner.

Tango is not Rocket Science

VonBraun's Rocket Science Tango Studios:
Planning the first Volcada to put a woman on the Moon

Please tango teachers!   Will you please stop talking about how difficult tango is?  Tango is NOT rocket science!  The best teachers in all areas of life have inspired me to learn, not overwhelming me with how infinitely deep the subject they are teaching is.

Tango is perhaps the easiest dance on earth, but with a learning curve that seems to go wonderfully on forever.   One could attempt to claim that all dances are this way, but I can only say that I have never experienced anything like it in all areas of my human experience: Tango is the easiest thing that is delightfully more and more challenging. 

Mortality Rates among Male Dancers

Birth of a male tango baby:
Will he die soon, like so many before him?

Male tango babies are not born with two left feet.

Just one is on the left.

Mortality Rates among Male Tangueros
No pity is needed here.  Just a fact:  Male tango babies have lower birth rates, and mortality rates, especially in anti-dance cultures.  No one has to pat the surviving males on the back or show us your sincere empathy.  Survivors sometimes are the worst at seeing the problem because they survived.  (Think "hell week" at a fraternity.  Why does senseless pain keep going on.  Survivors often don't understand.)  This discussion in not really about men or for me; it's about the survival of the tango-tribe, and for both men and women to enjoy a resilient community that includes a gender balance.  Some dance-friendly cultures and healthy communities will not even know what this post is about.  However, if gender imbalance is a problem in your culture, your community or town, you may have a

Sichere Wege ins Abseits: Klatsch, Tratsch, Neid, Eifersucht und Missgunst

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To avoid confusion, all posts in German are now found at Tango Therapeut

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Sichere Wege in Abseits: Klatsch, Tratsch, Eifersucht und Missgunst

Envy is not the Way!

On the left:  Envy and Gossip.  

On the right: Her regular self.

 I prefer her days that Envy does not visit.  

Beauty fades but friendliness and kindness can shine more and more. Some women blame aging or others for not dancing as much as they'd like to.  But outside factors probably have little or nothing to do with getting to dance more.   I see younger women sitting more than they would like, but their presentation has me wondering if they are so angry that it will take too much effort for them to relax when they "finally" get asked to dance.   Also, there are too many older woman who are dancing for age, beauty or clothing to be a valid excuse. The first thing a man or woman needs in