Saturday, January 30, 2021

Literally dying from a lack of touch

Encuentro in Newport News, Virginia by Ivy Garrenton
Sybille, my wife, and I were talking about the five languages of tango, and I think she formulated what allows people to stay a long time in tango:

"People start dancing tango for different reasons, but those who stay with tango, stay because their dominant love language is the Language of Touch," she quipped.

I think she is has a good point.

Dying to dance tango? No.
At least, I don't think it is dancing that we are so missing. It is probably more that you are dying to have human touch.  A desire to have socially acceptable human touch with many people may add years to your life, according to the research.  This is especially true of certain people. Although research indicates that human touch increases in its pleasantness the older we get, the lack of touch especially as infants and older adults can lead to "the failure to thrive" conditions, leading to an "unexplainable" death.  This idea of having a dominant Language of Touch is another way of understanding how people literally die from a lack of touch, which I mentioned back in November.

If human touch with friends, family, and one's partner is important in a general sense, and you personally especially crave human touch, then tango will be your long-lived friend. Having the luxury of touch adds
 years to your life on the planet.  


Some prefer the other 4 languages.  
Gary Chapman, the author of The Five Love Languages, suggests other languages that I believe are complementary to tango-- the languages of Quality Time and Words of Affirmation.  Coupled with the Language of Touch, tango will be pleasant for a long time.  When I wrote the post The Five Languages of Tango, the first draft had problems with the so-called languages of "receiving gifts" and "acts of service."  But it became clear. The freedom of movement and expression is the greatest gift you can give to many people.  In the realm of dances, there are simply some better dances for this than tango.  Seeking a "freedom of movement" high? You might be in the wrong dance studio, and you might be a menace on the dancefloor!

Longevity in life and tango may be correlated, but the dance is so much more enjoyable when we give each other a warm embrace. Is touch your dominant language, your most fluent language? Tango itself needs to stay with this foundational strength; otherwise, I fear that tango itself will once again die out as so many dances have over history. I love other dances for movement, but if tango stays with its own foundation, it will come back strong after the pandemic once again allows a warm embrace.



Photo credit:
The line of dancers in the ronda was taken by Ivy Garrenton https://m.facebook.com/ivygarrenton/ at the Newport News, VA (USA) encuentro.  March 2018.