Tango and Developmental Psychology

Whatever behavior or cognitive skill developmental psychologists study, only one human behavior does not quite fit into their model.  That one thing is dance.

Developmental psychology started out as the science of understanding how infants and the very young develop.  Now, however, developmental psychology has expanded to study how we keep growing, developing over the course of our entire lifetime.  I think that tango dancers would benefit with a scientific look of the developmental course of dancers. For example, I would like to know why one tango dancer's passion goes on for a lifetime and another dancer's intense passion fizzles out in just a few months or years. But whatever developmental psychologists might find, they would have to grapple with the unique nature of dance.

Dance, unlike other behaviors for the majority of adults, requires a retrograde step back into our childhood. Wouldn't it be wonderful for a person who says they cannot dance to see a film of themselves as they respond spontaneously to music for the very first time as a child? Today's parents are recording these moments on the smart phones, but the majority of the planet have not seen this moment. Wouldn't it be great if we could see our unabashed joy or a sudden level of body/mind skill appear? Other constantly developing skills, such as speaking, skills in logic, social skills, gross and fine motor skills--any other life skills--do not required a return to childhood to go on with the development of that skill.  Dance often does. Unfortunately this return to childhood is required because in many cultures dance is abandoned as children grow up and adults lose all belief in themselves as dancers.  But so what?  What is lost if we give up dance in our later childhood?  The majority of development psychologists will ask this question with the assumption that dance is not an essential skill, like speaking, walking and logical reasoning. So . . .  is this a fair question?

The Science of the Embrace

Social tango is a dance of touch. Social tango dancers need no visual cues. A recent research article on touch has made me rethink tango. There are a few things that I now realize. First, I realize (the obvious) that the tango embrace communicates emotion far more than most of us realize. And secondly, I am intrigued with how the researchers called the person touched the "decoder" and the one who touches, "the encoder."

Many dances seem clearly dance-dyads of "encoders" and "decoders" (leaders and followers), but if social tango is truly a dance of touch, lacking visual clues, then perhaps tango is NOT a dance of encoders and decoders. In tango we touch and are touched. Much research has been dedicated to voices and facial expressions to convey emotion. The "voice" of emotion is the music in music-centric improvisational dances like tango and west coast swing. There is no speaker/listener, leader/follower or encoder/decoder in touch. Touch is egalitarian. So perhaps I overstate that tango is a dance of touch, but if I am right, then we should pay more attention to how we truly communicate (both encode and decode) through touch.

I have the summary of the research below.  The scientists found that strangers merely touching a person on the arm can accurately convey complex emotions--even with no visual clues.*

Endogenous or Exogenous Tango?

Chicho Frumboli and Roxana Suarez

Sybille, my wife, and I had this discussion at dinner on our balcony about a Parisian film maker, Roberto, whom we know.  Roberto has worked meticulously to put together the feeling of tango in  many short films of dancers at European encuentros.  He also films at some tango festivals, which unlike the smaller events, includes star performances and visually appealing moves of many of people which attend these events. Films of stars dancing may take only a few hours of editing to produce.  Roberto's preferred theme is filming about endogenous tango--the internal feeling of tango, his passion. He has a talent for showing how people share​ those hard-to-catch elements that surround tango beyond just the dance, beyond the flashy moves. He captures the embrace, smiles, requests to dance without words.

The 4 Ways of Saying "I love tango"

This is part II on the four distinct ways of saying "I love you" in Ancient Greek.

If the poet Elizabeth Barrett Browning had danced tango, this perhaps would be the way she would have started off her famous poem:

Tango partners ...

"How do I love thee? Let me count the ways.
I love thee to the depth and breadth and height
My soul can reach, when feeling out of sight
For the ends of Being and ideal Grace....."*

The poem, given in full below, tells of a love that is deeply diverse.  Had Elizabeth Barrett Browning written her poem in Ancient Greek, surely she would have used four different words for "to love." 

Tango and Platonic Eros

Do you have enough Éros in your tango?

How about ágápē, philía, and storgē-love?

The Ancient Greeks, who had more distinct ways of speaking about "love," would find it incomprehensible if they had to learn English, French or Spanish.  They surely would be perplexed how we use "to love" or "aimer" or "querer" as verbs for many different things:  "to like," "to bond to," "to lust for," "to want," or "to love."  I think the inhabitants of ancient Greece would demand more exactitude for language.  "I love you," "je t'aime" and "te quiero" all need a big dose of context.  In what context do you love tango?  Let's use the language of some of the greatest philosophers of all time to talk about our Philosophy of Dance (PhD)!  In Ancient Greek we can experience four distinct ways for loving our tango and the people with whom we dance by using the words: éros, ágápē, philía, and storgē.  What is your strongest expression for the love of and your love in tango?

Grace Overcomes, Grace Survives.

Do you want to maintain your love of dance? Then, I recommend that you dance for survival.  Dance to create the inner happy hormones, such as endorphins, for a lifetime of enjoyment.  From an evolutionary perspective, grace's link to survival has been overlooked by the scientific community. Unfortunately, the psychological research community also remains mostly in the dark to the importance of grace.  Yet, grace is necessary in every animal movement if the animal is to survive. Also, authentic grace--as all survival behaviors--belongs no more to females than males.  Primordial grace starts from its epicenter in the survival of all species, and although sometimes grace is beautifully represented in the arts, all too often the outward performance of grace creates an adrenaline "rush" and cortisol stress hormones, mixed with mood elevating and calming hormones.  I often hear people complain of a dancer who "looks good" but only causes their partners stress with a barrage of cool moves, or the outwardly "graceful" person feels strangely awkward.  I maintain that authentic grace creates mostly endorphins, the "happy hormones" which elevate our mood. Endorphins tell you that you are truly being graceful.

An interview on Tango Therapy

Dance Papi, a blog about dance, published this article on tango therapy on April 5, 2016.


By Maria Ore (used with permission)
   
Tango Therapy:
An Interview with Therapist, Mark Word

A few months ago, we posted an article about salsa, dance therapy, and PTSD. The post led us to connect with one of the readers who commented on the article, Mark Word. Mark is a therapist who worked for many years as a social work officer in the Army. Today, he continues his practice as a civilian working for the military, taking a special interest in those who suffer from PTSD.

Fear of Judgmental Eyes

Relationships are harmed when one person wants to dance and the other refuses to. What is behind the refusal? There are many possible causes, but a fear of being judged is often the unnamed reason for not even starting a dance class, or later not fully enjoying a milonga. Are people sitting there as you dance judging you? Probably not. The problem is the perception you are being judged.

Even with the attainment of tango perfection, this particular anxiety may not go away. Take a moment to recall if you know a talented musician or dancer who is debilitated by the fear of being watched and judged.  I know many talented people like this.  So the ability or the attainment of tango skills is not the issue with this social anxiety. Skill is indeed needed, but it is to put the feeling of being judged to rest!  And it does take skill. Fair and kind self-talk script writing is a great skill. Below, I am going to suggest a few things that will help you or a friend to develop this skill. You can write the new scripts all by yourself, and if that does not work, a life coach or CBT therapist* can help you.

Here's a video that gives the feeling of judgmental eyes very well:

The "Choir Effect" in Tango

Does it feel like you are part of a choir when you dance?

What intrigues many dancers is why people dance tango throughout their lives, and others "lose the magic" and quit altogether.  During the early phase of learning tango, it's hard to imagine walking away from something so wonderful.  So why do people quit? 

What makes tango therapeutic?

What makes tango therapeutic?  If you know the answer to this question, then you will dance throughout your life.

All therapeutic interventions (psychological / physical / spiritual) need certain conditions to have a positive, healing effect. Tango's therapeutic effect is tied to a special mix of psychologically cleansing elements:  Movement, Music and the eMbrace.  These are the Three M's of tango.  Then there is a  "meta-element" which binds them together.  This binding element is improvised tandem movement as a somatic response to the music.

Only the core--the essence--of tango is reliably

Dance: The Children of Music

Imagine--if you will--a time when Archetypes roamed the earth.  I see two parents taking their newly adopted small children to the park.  The children are now playing as the adoring parents look on.  In their joy, the parents begin harmonizing together a song to the children.

The children do not know that they have been adopted by Music, incarnated as a man and woman.  Most Archetypes are just one person, but Music is a man and a woman.  The children never have heard Music, their parents, before.  They have never danced before, but upon hearing Music, they spontaneously become the incarnation of Dance.  The children were not asked or instructed how to dance; they simply dance.  The children dance in awe of Music as if they were compelled even against their will to move.

Soon the children learn to sing like their parents. One day they sing and clap their hands for their parents. The children's song reminds Music, the parents, that they once were children, incarnations of Dance.  As the children sing, their parents, although adults,  return to their childlike-form and spontaneously dance.  Yet Music dances differently than the children do:  They dance united in a synchronized, spontaneous embrace.  The children watch in awe.

This is the circle of life.  Music becomes Dance.  Dance becomes Music.  I was once a musician.  I became a dancer, which only reminded me of my childlike state.  When the music begins, it fills my body and takes over my soul to do things that I have never done before, nor what I ever have been taught to do. The circle of life is a musical dance of embrace.  In a word:  Tango.

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Photo Credit:  Dance watches Music dance the dance of embrace.
http://un-amore-per-sempre.tumblr.com/post/46691609124/sinuses-children-watching-mom-and-daddy

Your tango signature is all over your body

Why forge your tango teacher's signature?  Movement signatures are being scientifically measured for each person's unique "Individual Motoric Signature," as reported in The Journal of the Royal Society.* Should we copy other dancers' unique movement signatures? It seems that many try to do exactly that.  Let's say that we could: What would be gained?   People sometimes say, "I wish I could dance just like him."  Really?

What makes tango anti-social

Rejection, unlike fear, sadness and anger look
like physical pain in brain scans

Translations:  Romanian / German [pending]

Although tango is called a social dance, too often certain community milongas are poor examples of social behavior. The solution requires an easy change in behavior for those dancers new to tango or those who have been dancing for years. When I hear people complaining about the asocial or even arguably anti-social milongas, they mention the character of people.  Character problems rarely are the problem.  The problem is shunning (acting as if certain people do not exist, as if they are invisible). The perpetrator usually does not know how damaging it is.  First, let's look at some modern research and see why it is so important not to shun for both those who do it and those who are being shunned:

It Takes One to Tango

It takes one person to tango--at least to tango well.

26.2 Tango

My most pleasant marathon was not 26.2 miles of running.  It was a tango "marathon."  I have finished around a dozen marathons by running, but only two by dancing. I am certain that the One City Newport News Tango Marathon just can never be topped, going by the amount of fun my partner and I had.  How could it get any better?

Why dance classes have little to do with dance

This is Part III in a series on the Eight Elements of Movement . . .
See the links at the bottom of this post for part I & II and a review of the Eight Elements.

As small children and as we develop we take no special classes to be able to walk, crawl, climb, or dance.  We are helped along in our development, but mostly we just crawl when we need to, and if we hear music for the first time, we move to the music without having ever seen anyone dance.  The ability to move without instruction to music is truly amazing.  And this is why dance classes for adults are in reality "grace classes."  Dance is something we already are hardwired to do.  If classes were truly about dance, the instructor would put on music and let you re-experience what it was like to be a child again--remember the things you may have forgotten which are still inside of you.

Do not go back to basics

"Simplicity is the ultimate sophistication." Leonardo da Vinci 

Dancers often lament having to start all over with a new teacher.  What a sad thing it is to learn that we need to "return to the basics."  Private lessons may have been started for the express purpose of going from being intermediate finally to be advanced.   The prospect of working on basics may have more than a few people shaking their heads and telling themselves,  "I thought I was getting pretty good.  Now, I am starting all over!"

There is a solution to this problem: 

Awesome Dance: A Duet of Awe

 

Being in awe of beauty seems to be uniquely human.  Animals are often better than we are for being in the present, being in their bodies.  But awe?  This is something that knocks the air out of us.  We are speechless.  Moved.  Spell-bound.  How often do you stand in awe of beauty's presence?  If you dance tango, my guess is that your answer is:  "Nearly every time I dance."   Visual awe, such as with the great outdoors, or aural awe both can make us spell-bound.   However, dance unites the inner world of aural awe to the outward expression of grace, which makes music and dance--the great Duet of Awe--so important to our lives.

The Eight Elements of Movement, part II Psychological Well-Being

A resiliency walk on a sacred labyrinth, a holy path or in a tango embrace
leads to the same place:  Psychological well-being.

Dancers often have the sense that dance is the highest pinnacle of movement.  I have no doubt that it truly is.  I am convinced that music and dance remain in our DNA as the thinking animal's way to process critical events (psychological trauma), oppression, and catastrophic conditions.  Dance also celebrates our highest of joys, which words cannot touch.  Dance makes us resilient--yes--but all movement can help our resiliency to some degree when they are done with grace. In Part I of this series on the Eight Elements of Movement, I suggested that grace is NOT for aesthetics.  It is primarily for survival. The graceful gazelle outruns the lion better than the clumsy one.  Also, I argued that grace serves all animals for their psychological well-being.  Grace of movement needs space and feels good.  A caged animal feels terrible.  I then focused on dance's special role.   Now here in part II of the Eight Elements of Movement, let's look at the practice of grace on all Elements. 

Snow Apocalypse Milonga

The end-times are certain.  Theologians and astrophysicists agree on this point.  We got a sense of the End-of-the-World Milonga here in Washington, D.C.  I first heard the term "snow apocalypse" at work on Tuesday.   Now the prophecy is in full swing.  There is such a hype over the end of the world around me!  Aren't people reading the Bible? Aren't people heeding what the astrophysicists are saying?  The End is supposed to happen!

Dance: One of the Eight Elements of Movement

So why are you drawn to dance?  There is a good chance that you have realized that you need music and dance in your life.  Perhaps you feel that music and dance helps to "process" all the difficult things you have experienced in life.  I am convinced from working as a  therapist with those who suffer from psychological trauma that graceful movement is essential for overcoming the mounting difficulties most mature adults endure during their lifetimes.   We need to move in order to remain psychologically resilient.  Being caged drives us mad.

Dance, the bodily reaction to music, is just one of the eight movements of our evolution and our childhood development.  Dance is the most powerful, but all of the movements can be practiced gracefully for a more robust psychological resiliency.  The other seven movements are:

New Year's Resolutions

My New Year's tango resolutions are simple as a-b-c.

• Dance simply. . .
• ...but not too much.
• Nurture my dance relationship with my partner.

1. Dance simply.  Grace feels good and dancing (responding) to the music feels good.  I plan to combine them as best I can without giving up the embrace.  Now that I am back in the US, I see and feel the lure of doing cool steps, opening the embrace.  Let the Force be with me.  The Dark Side of tango gymnastics has corrupted so many Jedi Dancers.  Let it not be me!

How to visit Tango Cloud Nine more often

If you you want to visit Tango Cloud Nine more often, then pay attention to how well a person hears and responds to the music.  

Somatically responding to music is truly dancing--and especially in an improvisational dance like tango. So the first and foremost criteria for those with whom you will dance should be their musicality and their grace to be able to safely dance in tandem with you. "Advanced dancers" may have a better chance of being in the music, but often they are graceful but not musical, or fail to create the feeling of safety on the dance floor.  So my new definition of social tango is:    

When a musical instrument comes to life

I really wanted my mother to have that dress she couldn't afford:  A tango Christmas Story. 

The bandoneón case would smile at me, "Want to play?"

My father introduced Sara to me when I was 12-years old, and she quickly became my best counselor, mentor, and friend.  

Sara is my bandoneón. 

As a teenager or even a young adult, I would have never told you these things, but now, I am old enough to know that when I speak my heart, others who are silent speak up and tell their secrets too.

I think it is hidden from the world that instruments have their own life, but it shouldn't be hidden at all. And even if I am the only one?  At least Sara will understand.